A wonderful thought

I think I saw a chapter of my life that was supposed to happen before I had kids. I knew that I would continue to be creative and to be who I am even after having a child. I saw my brothers and friends go through it and some of my friends got rid of their musical instruments, quit their bands, whatever they thought would distract them from being the grown up they now needed to be. And then a few months later they'd start buying back instruments and being the kind of parent who actually has something to share with their child.

When you announce you're having a kid everyone says, "Oh, you're life is going to be changing." But I discovered, by going so long without kids that your life changes no matter what. And I observed in my brothers and friends that life stays the same in many ways too.

So, I wasn't worried that I would give up my art but I have worried that I would have less of an edge and I was definitely aware that I'd have less time. I planned then not to have a child until I was successful enough as an artist that I was doing it full time and I was content with the thought that I might never have children. I thought I was content anyway. As I got into the later part of my thirties without having achieved that goal I realized that having a kid was something I wanted, really wanted, enough that I would have regrets if I waited much longer.

Yesterday I had a wonderful thought regarding the parent/artist relationship. I remembered that I used to think a steady relationship would be detrimental to my artistic output, effecting my "edge" and the amount of time I have for creativity. The effect has been the opposite. Bryna's support has allowed me to pursue my creative endeavors more than anything else. So, having a child may surprise me as well. Being a parent will take a-lot of my time, I know this, but it may give me inspiration and drive I never imagined. We'll see. :D

Still no baby

Trying to not let this become a bad thing. Babies are often late and a test (fetal monitoring strip) yesterday determined ours is happy and healthy.
So, no worry yet. Bryna is still making progress towards labor and we're working on being calm, cool and collected which amazingly enough I'm actually having some success at. Bryna has always been better at these three Cs.
They're talking about possibly inducing tonight which would see us delivering with the Dr. that we like best. This may seem like a silly consideration in the grand scheme of things but it sure is comforting to think of being in the hands of someone you have a connection with.

3 Days Past Due Date

Advice for expectant parents, I'd say just assume you're going to get your baby late because I assumed she on time and I don't know why I assumed that, but I did and now I can't seem to reconcile myself to waiting. I'm getting cranky and frustrated, I can't quite just go back to my life until it happens but every time I think it's happening it doesn't happen and I'm going a bit out of my head. Contractions today. Started timing them with something called "Contraction Master" but as soon as Bryna timed the first one they seemed to go away. Is it coincidence that around the same time she looked around and saw more nesting still undone and went to work? I can't help feeling like she is just keeping labor at bay until everything is perfect. What? Not scientific? Oh go get bent.

Advice from big brother

I wrote my big brother John for advice. When it comes to parenting he and his wife Raquel are my heroes and their daughters are wonderful, happy, self realized people.
Here is the advice he sent:

"If daughter doesn't get loved from dad, she will get loved from another man who might not have her best interest at heart.

Quality time always comes in the midst of quantity time.

Always watch the Simpsons

Include them in your good works, that how they learn that they are not the most important people on the planet, but then treat them like they are anyways

Tell them about Jesus so they can go to heaven when they die"

The Jesus part is totally sincere but said with a sense of humor at the same time. He does not actually fear that I'm going to hell, but he does actually believe that Jesus is magic. We Jensens are smart asses and have been for generations.

Thanks John. This is really great advice, sincerely.

Today is The Due Date!

But no sign of labor yet, well, no new signs anyway. The occasional lone contraction.
Now we get to find out just how annoying "Baby? Baby yet?" really is.
And I did it to my cousins so karmically I have it coming.
I have been twittering and every twitter post gets replies of "Congrats" and "Yay exciting." and now I think everyone is getting a bit tired of congratulating and being excited.
As for me, I'd like to have a baby now please. I waited, it's time, give me baby.

OMG

OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG TWO DAYS LEFT UNTIL DUE DATE.

She's already felt contractions!!!

OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG

Turkey's Done!

6 days 'til due date!
Bryna's belly button is now an outie. She was sure it would pop quite some time back but I didn't think so. I bet her it wouldn't pop before halfway through September while she was sure it would be any day all the way back in mid August. She made it into October.

It made me think of the little red pop up thing that lets you know when a turkey is done cooking. The baby is done apparently.

Maybe today I'll learn how to use the scanner so I can put up some ultrasound pics.